[intro music playing] GEOFF: Do you guys remember when I had that sex dream with Jenny McCarthy? Yeah, I had another one the other night. Do you guys know the comedian Jenny Slate? I was having a dream the other night and we were in L.A. for a party, for some work thing. And, she was there. And, she was just, like, really fucking cool and funny, and we were joking and hitting it off, and stuff. And then, Griffon and Millie were there, too. And, they were like, “We gotta go back to Austin.” because Griffon had to a chainsaw carving or something, And, so, I was like, “Oh, well, I’ll just hang out here with Jenny Slate.” And, uh… we were just hanging out, shooting the shit. And, you know, having a lovely time. And, then, at some point, she was like– gave me a hug. And, it was, like, a sexually charged hug. And, my dick was, like, “Hello!” And, uh… then she, like, nuzzled my neck a little bit, and I was like, “Oh, boy!”
[Geoff mumbles] And, then, she’s like, “Do you wanna go back to my hotel room with me?” -MICHAEL: Ho-ho-ho!
-JEREMY: Woah. GEOFF: I was like, “Woah. Do you, uh–” And, she’s like, “Yeah, for sex, idiot.” And, I’m like, “Oh. Well, I am married.” And, she’s like, “I don’t see your wife.” -JEREMY: Ooh, wow. Slut.
-GEOFF: And, I’m like, “Uh, yeah, she’s–” GEOFF: So, I was, like, “W– uh… h-hold on a second, I gotta make a phone call. And, she goes, “You’re going to call your wife and ask if you can have sex with me, aren’t you? And, I was like, “Yeah.” And, she goes, “Well, make it fast.” And, I was like, [softly] “OK.” So, I walked out the room and I called Griffon. And, I was like, “Hey, you’re not going to believe it, but, that Jenny Slate chick, she hit on me.” And, Griffon’s like, “What?” And, I was like, “Yeah, she– she wants to have sex with me.” And, Griffon’s like, “Excuse me?” And, I’m like, “Listen, this is a dream, so it shouldn’t matter.” [the others laugh] And, she goes, “I don’t care if it’s a dream, I will wake up in the real world and I will remember this– [Jack laughs] “if you have sex with her in this dream.” And, I was like, [stuttering] “Are you–” She was like, “I will know.” -GEOFF: And, I was like, “OK.”
-MICHAEL: Damn, dude MICHAEL: at that point you gotta know, are you in you dream or are you in Griffon’s? She’ll fucking kill you. GEOFF: So, that was the end of the dream. She was like, “I will know.” And, I was like, “OK… OK.” And, then I woke up. I’m getting real sick of not getting laid im my dreams, though. -GAVIN: I like how faithful you are, even in dream form.
-GEOFF: Yeah, Griffon said I was stupid. She was like, “Stop putting this on me! “I don’t care if you sleep with women in your dreams.” And, I’m like, “obviously you do.” [outro music playing]